When Alex and Amy first started talking about foster care, it was not a question of if, but when. Now, more than a year into caring for their first child, they say the experience has become part of everyday family life.

Alex knows firsthand the difference a safe, loving home can make. He grew up in foster care from about the age of 10.

Years later, Alex and his wife Amy began their own foster care journey. Alex works in communications and engagement, while Amy is a registered nurse and midwife. Together, they were raising two young children and had always imagined foster care would one day be part of their family.

A conversation that started at the markets

For Amy, foster care had long been something she hoped to do. Earlier in life, she had worked with young people, including children in care and residential settings, and had developed a strong commitment to supporting children who needed extra care.

“I always wanted to do foster care,” Amy said. “Then I met Alex, and he had always planned on doing it too. It was a very easy conversation because we didn’t really have to have one.”

The family’s first step came unexpectedly at a local market, where a foster care agency had set up a stall. Amy initially felt their children were still too young, but the conversation stayed with them. They decided to take their time, ask questions and find the right agency and support for their family.

After researching local options, they contacted Upper Murray Family Care. Amy said the extensive training and support they received helped them feel prepared and confident.

“Everybody that we’ve come across has been so supportive and made it so easy,” she said.

Learning the why behind the what

Both Alex and Amy say the training gave them a deeper understanding of trauma, child development and the ways children’s past experiences can shape their behaviour, relationships and sense of safety.

Amy found the focus on children’s brains and bodies especially useful.

“Sometimes stuff will happen and you’re like, ‘Oh, but this is happening because that happened,’” she said. “They’re not doing this because they’re trying to do this. It’s actually a response to something that’s happened in their past.”

For Alex, the training also brought together personal experience and practical knowledge.

“It was really interesting learning the why behind the what,” he said. “You know there’s trauma, but doing the training helped explain how something right back at the start can surface later on.”

Busy, loud and full of energy

Today, Alex and Amy have three boys in the house: their two children and the child they are caring for, who is close in age to their eldest. The boys are busy, loud and full of energy, but Amy says they have built strong bonds.

“They just do life together,” she said.

Like any family, there are challenging moments. But for Amy and Alex, those moments sit alongside the everyday joy of watching the children play, argue, reconnect and grow together.

“It’s beautiful now that we’re a year deep because they’re developing such strong connections,” Amy said. “The good moments far outweigh all of that.”

“I can’t imagine it being any other way”

For anyone thinking about foster care, Alex and Amy’s story is a reminder that carers do not need to have everything perfectly figured out before they begin. 

What matters most is a willingness to learn, to be supported and to offer a safe, stable place for a child who needs one.

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